one step away

i'm taking 1 step away from u since last night.
i hope this is the right thing coz i don't want to hurt myself by faking my reactions when u told me about that girl. i'm being selfish as u did the same for me right?
i hope this is the best for us.
oppss...there's no more us..we're totally different from each other now
but then i still felt calm and relieve..
alhamdulillah.. :)

i knew you were trouble~~
this song keep playing in my head.
hahaaa..lots of songs played in my head lately since that night
but this one is the current one with "aku yang tersakiti"

ohh...i also took one step closer to someone..
ehhh..no.he did that not me actually..*wink3*
just one step closer not anything ok?
i'm not ready for anything yet.
so he do understand..
too well actually..:p

i'm not opening my broken heart to anyone coz i don't even knew where my heart is..
its everywhere i guess...
hohoh...lots more things to go for my final exam.
i'm praying my success for this exam..please3 i want to pass each and every paper i took this semester..
may Allah ease..

got to go~~

sayang-shae 2

ni video plak..

oh..ku sudah gilakkkk....

blank

blank.
memang blank je sekarang.
jumpe SV kena bebel2 sket,duk angguk n ok2 je
tapi sebenarnye blank giler dah.....=_=

maybe sebab xberapa sihat lately.
maybe jugak sebab MALAS.

ntah la.asyik2 makan minum ubat pastu tido.
sob3..
nasib bukan tido xbangun2 dah kan...

sekarang bukan setakat blank je tapi lost.
yup.totally....

blog = my babbling site

just so u know.i am a bad girl.
i write and speak whatever in my mind at that particular time.
and in my blog i did and always say lots and lots of things which i NEVER post it or say it somewhere else.

bear in mind i always reveal my dark side of thoughts HERE.
just in here.
my emotion too.
that's the main reason i kept my blog private to my family and random friends.
that is why i don't include my blog in google's search engine.
that is why most of my entries will label craps.
coz i'm babbling all the times here....
so if anybody(i know lots of you) that ever crossed and read my entry
and then happened to 'terasa'with my harsh words, i'm truly apologized to all of you.
in that case,i suggest never ever read my entry anymore cause it will hurt you later on.

i'm not good at words and speaking.
so my words normally will turns out to be harsh to most people
well, this is me.
and here is the only place i 'maki hamun' or 'merepek' through out my bad times.
almost everything i felt at the moments,i post it here.

so as I don't want to hurt anyone,i might be private-ing my blog.again.
or i might revert back most of my entries into draft.
that will be safe,right?

to those who didn't like it or probably hate me,i accept that.
i know its my fault.
but just a reminder again,read from the title of my blog and to the descriptions i stated above before proceed to my  entries here..
TQ and sorry again..

p/s: as i say,i'm not good in words in fact i'm terrible with it and that's the main reason i don't respond to yours. but please don't try to contact me at this crucial period.i tend to get annoyed or angry without any reasons..thx for your consideration....:)

playlist

sekarang ni tengah study packaging..

eh..salah..tengah taip entry ni la..

tapi supposedly kena study plus buat wat sume kerja2 yang melambak2 tu..*sigh*

ntah la kenapa saya langsung xde mood nak ngadap sume benda.

sume except movie,games,songs and sleeping...=__=

ohh..talking about songs,see entry before ni?

yes.my playlist totally mixed up from nowhere.

sume sebab dah format lappy.

so saya letak all songs together in one big folder.

ok la.dalam tu de few small folder tapi yang baru+lama333 punye songs sume dah mixed up..!

bile saya nak create playlist baru kat WMP,saya klik ctrl a and paste all them in my new playlist...!!

so u can imagine how messed up are they now..!

then sebab 1 playlist tu boleh sampai berpuluh2 jam,saya drag almost half of it to another new playlist

then drag few more into another playlist.

so my first playlist is 20 hours,second is 12.6 hours and the third one is 6 hours....!!

how am i supposed to find my favourite songs now?

this is how i end up sebab malas susun songs dari dulu

download yang baru maen paste je mane2.

bile nak format sume sumbat je dalam 1 tempat..

sekarang,padan muke sendiri.terpaksa mendengar lagu2 lame yang mengamit memori lama..

ceewaahh ayat..:p

xdela.saje je wat ayat gedik..

tapi bagus jugak..saya dengar balik lagu2 yang dah lama xdengar dalam ni..

mane rase2 xnak dengar,skip n remove dari playlist terus..kui3..

kalo nak dengar latest favourite songs,tukar earphone cucuk kat hp..

hehe..simple kan..jangan complicated kan hidup yang dah memang complicated ni...:)

anyway,yang pasal entry hp rosak tu,mne de rosak sebenarnye..

my roomate bagi hadiah yg dust cover tu.

supposedly bile cucuk kat lubang earphone tu,die xdetect pape

tapi c6 yang ku sayang memandai detect die headphone.yang saya lupe so thats why la orang call or saya call orang sume xdengar paper..

celah mane la dust cover tu de speaker kan..=_=

lame gile rase biler sedar.hhahaa...

ok la..sudah2 gelak kan saya ye..

dah lewat,sila tidur..:)

good nite all...

eh3..kul 4am dah la

malam ni sangat la boring.
nak study kemalasan amat menebal.
last sekali bukak youtube dengar lawak johan yang lama2
mule2 dengar yang video yang sy letak tadi.
pastu melarat2 dengar sketsa johara
adoi yaii...
sakit perut gelak je malam ni..
see dah kul 4 pg pun sy on9 lagi sebab seronok layan lawak2 johan ni

yang dia kantoi dengan Dr fadzilah la..
macam2 sy tengok..
tapi kena cover2 gelak sebab my roomate tgh study..:p

then bukak fb tgk kawan sorang ni post video die nyanyi.
melarat la cari balik video budak ni nyanyi 3 tahun lepas kat youtube
pastu jumpe 1 lagi video jan 2011.
tapi this time seriously sy sangat2 la xleh terima tu suare die..
video yang lama tu elok je sy suke
termasuk yg die baru post kt fb td tu
tapi yang 2011 ni,sy xleh terima tu suare die..huhuuuu
laen sangat la awk oii..
ke sy yang pek??kui3..

xpela papepun,seronok dengar lawk johan yang xpenah la nak kalah
de je benda die nak cakap tuk cover balik.hehe
ok la..wanna take a nap..:)

final mid-term

sekarang tengah cuti mid term lagi.
tapi as usual,i'm back to shah alam.early...=_=
niat di hati nak pegi lab awal pagi tadi.
tapi subuh tadi tetbe badan panas n kepala sakit berdenyut-denyut..
damn...
ni yang wat diri yang memang sudah sedia malas bertambah malas..:p
dengan cuaca yang sangat best,terus tarik selimut xmo bangun..hohoo

so sekarang tengah rilex2 on9 sambil planning hangout dengan cik zureen petang ni..
baskin n movie?
yup3..
31hb kan...thanks bestie ingat kan semalam..
anyway,plz do contact me asap ek..
kalo rase nak join petang ni pun di alu2 kan..huhu..

neway,congrats for the job..
lepas2 ni memang susah la dah nak jumpe kamu kan?so take care n jgn stress2 ek?
:)

sudah ku bilang

hari ni kembali ke SA.as usual la kan..
hari tu beli tiket kat pekan.tapi dah danis datang amek semalam bawak ke kuantan.
so pagi tadi kul 10.40am dah gerak dari umah sebab serik bai kena tinggal bus.
sekali dah sampai kat bandar,jammed giler..!
damn..
mule2 rilek lagi sebab awal lagi kan.bus kul 11.30.
sekali puas abg ipar pusing jalan laen,still jammed x gerak..grrrr...
call kaunter bus mintak number driver.
cakap2 dengan pak cik tu pastu memang xsempat so pak cik tu suh tukar tiket ke KL je kul 12.30pm.
xpela.redha je dh.huhu..
so officially sudah kena tinggal dengan bus wat kali ke 3..T__T

bazir duit sungguh..
xpela.de rezeki laen nanti kan..insyaAllah..

eh2,nape dengan tajuk tu?
owh.luper.sebenarnye dari hari sabtu saya dah cakap2.hari isnin mesti my SV akan call saya.
sekali tengah hari tadi time tengah tunggu bus die call.
memang xdengar la kan so sorry ye 'mama'..
saya xrela angkat call 'mama' lagi.
esok pagi ye jumpe..=_=.. xikhlas

okla.mau rehatkan mental n fizikal.
kena get ready kan mental n fizikal tuk esok n hari2 seterusnya..zzzzzzzzzzz
eh..salah..hehe.bye2 n wassalam~~

ramadhan 2012

selamat menyambut ramadhan semua..:)
sorry lame giler xupdate ape2..macam de sape2 kisah kan...:p
so tahun ni saya berpuasa kat SA je.
dengan few friends yang stay untuk wat FYP.
mostly puasa kali ni penat la jugak sebab asyik turun naek lab je.
hurm..FYP ni betol2 banyak mencabar diri saya.
bukan mencabar ape.mencabar semangat diri sendiri,kesabaran and juga soft skills.
heh..banyak sebenarnya tapi xlarat nak citer kat sini.
just hoping semuanya berjalan dengan lancar since saya kena wat keje dekat 4-5 lab.
and saya cuma ada masa cuti ni je untuk siap kan.
harap2 sempat la kan..
xpela berkorban apa saja demi belajar.
harap2 pengorbanan yang saya buat ni berbaloi..aamiin3..

owh ye.malam tadi abang saya balik kampung.
sedih jugak x dapat ikut.
yela saya duk kat lab pun sampai kul 4.30pm.
kalo nak g umah die,ntah kul berapa la sampai kan..so decide stay sini je..
xpela dapat rest sket sebelum start masuk lab lusa kan.

owh ye.cuti ni jugak saya jadi ON..
tau pe maksud die?
orang nomad..hehe
sebab jap2 saya balik umah sewa kawan,pastu stay kolej dengan classmate.
asyik pndah2 je.
sampai bawak barang pun merepek2.nasib de kawan2 yang sangat baek hati n pemurah.
banyak betol terhutang budi dengan diorang..
thanks cyg2 semua..mmuuaahhh3..
sayang korang.hehe
ok la.mau sambung tengok citer jap..:p

p/s: Hp plak wat hal.skrin gelap jek.hmmm.duit lagi tuh nak gune..macam2 la..

last paypeerrr2~~

sila baca tajuk dengan nada johan dalam Lawak Ke Der?? :P

ye.esok last paper untuk exam sem ni.

tapi,sindrom last paper melanda2..

grrrr...

apekah sindrom itu??

xmau bace notes,bace pun xfokus,otak fikir benda2 laen nak wat nanti

n paling penting KEMALASAN melande2..

ehh..memang saya pemalas pun kan selama ni..:p

ok la.xde pape nak citer.just nak cakap isnin pagi dah start wat FYP.

jadi berkampung di lab dari pagi sampai malam..

erkk..kalo dah lepas pukul 10.30 malam mne de bus nak balik umah sewa.camne ni??

xde ke sape2 bermurah hati nak bagi pinjam kete kat saya tuk sebulan ni??:P

jalan2 ritu

ni sje2 nak post balik pasal trip pergi zoo last 2 weeks kot.
siyes seronok giler pegi sane.
rase nak pegi lagi la...
rindu dengan sume binatang2 itu..rndu abg2 tu jgk

haha..

this is our team..
from left: syikin,yat,tiero,k.shida,sya.
sitting: abang officer yg comel.:p , abg ayob, abg yg xtau name,abg azman n abg lg sorg lupe name.
haha..
maaf memang saya pelupe..:p
pdahal abg yg hujung tu abg yg jage saya hari tuh..=_=
mintak maaf ye abang.huhu..

owh.abg azman bagi kitaorang misai harimau tu.hehe.
tu pun lepas puas bodek2 n mintak2..
haha..buat muke xmalu..:p

pastu bawah ni nak letak pic aju dgn cikgu azmi.
ritu pegi makan dengan diorg tu kan..:)

sorry aju aku tgkp pic ni xproper..
jgn majuk2 n marah kt aku tau..:p
kalo ko bce entry ni,jumaat ni dtg la amek aku jln2..hahaa...
suker2 je..:p

neway,baru download photoscape.
giler noob gune.belum lagi gune photoshop..=_=
ok la.tu je.esok de test..bye2..

cedera parah

cedera parah?
kenape?
siapa yang cedera???

|

|

|

|

|

|

V

V

V

V

V

dia ni la yang cedera parah tu...

hehe..jangan marah ye..xde siapa2 pun yang cedera parah.

cume my en domo je.

tangan die putus.eh dalam pic tu de sehelai benang je tinggal.

tapi pas amek gambar ni,try tgk2 tangan die sekali putus trus..waaaaa...

rase nak nangis terus call Mr K gtau.

tapi die cakap: xpela.benda murah memang camtu..

xpela.nanti de mase saya jahit awak ye sayang..

sabar tau..

wat mase ni domo tergantung dekat board saya.kena cucuk dengan pin bersama tangan nya yang putus itu..hoho..

p/s: tensen yang amat tapi mari bergembira juge..:p

dreamed

last few weeks i dreamed about this one guy.
err.this guy i used to admire back in end 2003-2004.
i was like: what the F i'm dreaming about you ek?
i don't even care about you anymore...zzz..it was 9years ago stories la.
so i just ignored the dreams even the morning i woke up it make me wonders: why you??

suddenly last night i dreamed about one of my ex-bf friend.
hurmm.this guy it was a very short time interval but it affect me for about few months.
but then again, what the H i dreamed about you pulak ni?
grrr...i am mad at myself for having such dreams.

well about this second guy,the truth is.....
i used to admire him also..err...in 2000-2001..=_=
but then we were too small la and i don't even knew i was admiring him..=_=
silly me..!
but then we lost contact since i moved to KKB.until early 2010 the group created and all those old friends from primary school keep adding me.
and there he goes..we chatted and text on phone also..the rest,i did mentioned about this guy in this blog..pegi cari sendiri.dah bagi exact time interval pun..:p


but still after few years i don't even bother about these two guys,why you suddenly appeared in my dreams eh?
it really make me wonder you know..

owh.1 more thing.i did visit his profile on fb just now and i took 'see friendship' with him.
then it only shows friend since april 2010.
eh?why all the details before that gone?
hahhaa.then i realized..he did remove me from his friend list for a while before.
well he did claimed he don't even know about it.
but right now i knew the truth.
he did it just for the sake to delete/make it gone all those history between us..right?
haha.clever move anyway.so that no one will knew or can access them again..:p
thanks anyway..:)

p/s: to those that already knew whose the guy,ssshhhhh..kept it to yourself k?:)

answer

for not being a good friend.

NO..!!
its not YOU that is not a good friend.

its me that is a BAD friend for you.

sorry 4 that entry.sorry for my actions.
let time cool me down.
and you know i'll always come looking for you no matter what happen.
so please bear with me for a while..

thanks n sorry again~~

p/s: damn jannah.see what u have done??

chatbox

baru bukak blog semula.means selama ni saya xview blog saya.

just baca dari dashboard gitu je

tapi dah perasan ritu chatbox problem.

rasenye ritu tu dela dalam 2bulan lepas..:p

so tadi bukak stil xkuar2,so saya remove jela terus.sorry kalo sape2 de hantar pape mesej kat situ..

kalo de pape sile komen kat entry ye.macam la de orang bace blog giler ni..

saya allow anonymous..*eh yeke ejaan ni?blur plak*

ok lah.mau tido awal.sekarang dapar rehat terus malas nak wat keje.

truk betol perangai..

owh.lupe entry before ni entry ke 300..:)

even de few yang saya revert back to draft pun kan..:p

and sorry sebab emo2 sangat entry sentap tu.

tapi ni je care nak hilangkan stress..harap maklum ye..

28th april..

..malam tu (28hb) my sister de program group FB die.so sebab abang ipar dah kuar malam tu die mintak saya hantar kan die pegi program tu.tu pun sebab orang kat program tu call jugak suruh die datang since die la pengasas group tu.
so gerak tu around 10.30pm.sampai kul 11pm..*haha.gle lembab cam kure2 saya drive..:p*
saya pakai t-shirt buruk je sebab ingat diorg just kumpul nak kenal ahli.sekali kau wat kat dewan.
ok la.dewan tu xde la besar.tapi de la almost 40 jugak yang datang.
program dah start kul 8pm.so kami datang wat muke selambe trus duduk.saya plak dukung raudhah(anak akak).
pastu MC cakap nak 2 org ahli yang lambat sampai perkenalkan diri (kami la tu)..saya dah macam....what the heck.aku bukan ahli pn kan..huhu.tapi kena la kenal kan diri jugak even kena usik sebab diorg ingat raudhah anak saya..*banyak kali dah orang cakap gitu..:p*

then diorg maen kotak beracun.1st round selamat,2nd round selamat time nak start 3rd round,saya maen dengan raudhah.duk cak2 dengan die.pastu rase cam pelik nape dewan cam senyap tapi muzik pasang.angkat kepale tengok sume pandang saya.pastu pusing ke kiri rupe2 nye kotak tu kat saya xgerak2..
then cepat2 amek kotak tu nak pas kat akak sorang tu sekali muzik stop..damnnn..!!
sume yang kena kotak beracun tu kena nyanyi kat depan..waaa...nangis la ini macam.
dah la yang 1st n 2nd round diorg boleh panggil kawan.time saya sorang2.
pastu die bagi plak lagu uji rashid yang memang saya xtau.
terus wat muke kesian kat MC cakap xacii la camni.
so die panggil brader (ke pakcik ye.hahaa) suh backup saya.nasib lagu duet.

dahhabis nyanyi trus kuar dewan call kawan sume.then masuk balik dapat hamper..hehe..
mule2 amek xkesah pun hamper tu sebab ingat sume sama size.sekali nak balik baru perasan kakak saya dapat hamper jugak tapi kecik sket..:p

 so kire berbaloi jugak la pegi program tuh.hehe..:p

baru bernafas sket

haha.kenapa tajuk cam harem jek?
meh citer balik dari isnin punye cite.
well,kan ritu balik dari 'cuti' hari isnin.sekali zureen mesej ajak lepak same2
at first plan nak jumpe selasa sebab takut sampai lambat kt kolej.
tapi sebab bus sani ekspress ni tetbe cepat je n xstop mane2,
kul 4.45pm dah sampai shah alam..:)
terus mesej zureen tanye nak kuar malam tu ke x..:p

so kami ke jj bukit raja je.tengok avengers.
giler full memanjang.sampai counter kul 6.50pm tapi kul 8.45pm de 2 session full.
so amek 9.30pm.tu pun 2nd row dari depan..=_=
xpela tu.layan je.makan pizza n then jalan2 pusing setiap kedai..:p
movie habis dah dekat kul 12am.
sekali time nak pegi kat kereta jatuh slide terus ke bawah sebab selipar licin sangat..wuu..T__T
xmau pakai dah selipar tuh..
malam tu lepak umah sewa zureen.sambung tengok sherlock holmes 2 plak..:p
tapi sebab dah ngantuk terus tutup..haha..

esok pagi nye baru sambung tengok.hehe
kul 2 gerak dari umah g lepak kat bintang sidewalk pe ntah kedai sebelah giant sek 7 tu.
sebenarnye nak makan kat kedai laen tapi parking full so ke giant sebab de orang ngidam nak cool blog..:p
hehe..
then kul 3 balik kolej dah..

neway,thanks aju 4 da day n for da treat..hehe..sayang ko lebih la gini..:D

so petang selasa tu lepak kat bilik sambung membuta.haha..
xsedar diri padahal rabu de test mandarin.
n of coz lab report juge.
so malam tu wat la report n study mandarin.
sumpah letih.
eh luper.saya wat slides sebab 'mama' tercinta hilangkan slides yang kami hantar ritu.
amek ko kul 3 pagi baru email kat die..T__T
kul 4 baru tido dengan notes mandarin..*sigh*

then rabu plak habis lab kul 4 lbh sket.mule2 dah happy sebab boleh balik awal.
sekali hujan lebat jugak la..so call cab.macam2 jawapan la dapat.tensi..
terpakse call cab no 1 jugak.
tunggu punye tunggu die tipuuuu ktorg...siot punyer pakcik..!.sakit hati giler.terus redah hujan dengan kawan2 tp tutup kepale dengan lab coat.dah macam hantu putih jalan ramai2 gitu..=_=

then balik bilik lepak jap.dah start rase xsihat.
tapi wat2 xtau je.
then sambung wat assignment sensory,study mandarin sebab de test listening plak rini.
pastu study toxicology plak sebab lepas class mandarin trus test toxic..
terbaek kan??+__+
mate berpina-pinar jugak la.badan dah start panas sejuk je sepanjang hari.
yela rini class sume kat DK dari pagi sampai petang.tapi cuaca kat luar punyer la panas terik.
haish..makin teruk dah rase.kepale berdenyut2 je.

balik class toxic trus tido xbangun sebab sangat sakit kepala + badan seram sejuk je.
kul 9.15 baru bangun g mandi n makan.
pastu duk ngadap laptop on9 sepuas hati.haha..balas dendam ni tensen sangat.
padahal keje banyak lagi nak kena wat.
tapi tensen sebab banyak sangat benda kena wat dalam 2-3 hari ni terus mood menggile datang...:p
sekarang tengah bace entry lama kat blog peej..hoho..

ok lah.panjang sangat plak.bye2..see ya another time..

p/s: IMY sayang.plz don't be moody2 like today..hope kamu dapat keje cepat2..huhu

terase diri sangat jahat

malam tadi this one uncle hantar chat kt fb.
dlu2 pn die sllu jgk hntr chat.ajak dtg umah raye,die belanje makan la pe sume kan.
tapi tu dulu..
lame gak la tak chat dengan die.
so malam tadi die chat sume tetbe die ajak saya ikut family die pergi holiday kat tempat anak die belajar.
siap nak belanje tiket tu.
i was like: seriously uncle??i don't even talk to you face to face.never.
we did meet each other lonnggggg time ago but i never approach you.
suddenly out of blue u invite me to join your family's vacation.
100% surely i said NO.
plus my already thought the one who send the chat to me was your son.not you.
so i was a bit harshly accusing few things.
but end up it turned up to be my assumption was totally wrong..

so here i would like to apologised to both of them.
hey.i already sent them messages saying that i'm so sorry about it.
if ONLY its true.

tapi kalo sebenarnye memang anak die tu yang suruh maen2 kan saya,siap lah kamu.
saya ngadu kat awek kamu nanti..hahaa..:p

p/s: otak dah sewel.jap taip malay.jap taip english.otak bercampur aduk.eh.baru tadi bestie cakap jangan tensen2..baek my bestie..:)

EDIT: oh.kenapa terase diri sangat jahat tu adalah kerana saya telah menuduh orang dengan sewenang2nya..maaf..

saya nak...

saya nak:

tidur

makan sedap2

shopping banyak

nak kek and coklat byk2.

sape nak sponsor??haha..:p

 ok merepek.

sebenarnye tengah sangat malas..hurmm..

edited: eh..sume entry bulan 4 ni dengan label tension..huhu

awal ashaari melamar scha al yahya

ok.tetbe kawan bagitau pasal video ni..

rase sebak tetbe..:(

betol la tahun ni memang ramai orang dapat jodoh.

saya je yang tak..*damn*

jeles teramat..T__T